Here or There?

I've had an online journal for almost 5 years now. It started out as an attempt to see if I would actually keep up with an online journal, plus a manner for my family and friends to see what was happening in my day, or what was going on in the often zany world of my 'grey matter'.

I actually believe that the people who know me well, probably see me as a sort of enigma, and yet in other ways as transparent as a glass of water.

With me, what you see is what you get- no facades, no superficiality (is that a word?), but in the same aspect, I'm far from predictable. One moment I can be serious and what many would consider 'boring', and the next I'm doing something that others would think are completely out of character for me.

I bore easily and like to throw a wrench in things to mix things up a bit. It's fun, and why not?

I digress. This information has place in yet another entry- one that I believe I'll sit outside in the grass overlooking a field with remnants of this years hay crop to write. The field, barren, yet beautiful in its own rights. After all, isn't everything? Even in the darkest, dirtiest and most painful places reside beauty waiting to be discovered, but again- I digress.

The space that held my journal for almost five years is no more. Not due to my own personal choice, but because of circumstances beyond my control.

I'm a very nostalgic person, and expected to feel a sense of loss upon hearing that Journalspace was no more, but surprisingly I didn't feel a sense of loss at all. Journalspace was a great place to write, and in fact, I literally have journals at probably 10 other journaling sites but that was my 'home' because of the user friendliness of the site, plus the sense of community.

But a website doesn't a community make, anymore than four walls makes a home. It is and always will be the people.

In almost five years, I've grown to know and love many people who have been a part of that very same space. That space disappearing doesn't change the dynamics of how I feel about those people, it only changes the manner in which I may communicate with them, since ALL of our 'spaces' are gone.

Some of those people (they know who they are) I've established close relationships with, and we have other manners in which to connect, and I know that wherever they choose to write, IF they choose to write, that I'll read them regardless.

There is a saying that with everything there is a season, a purpose- and I believe that Journalspace has had it's season, and I had my season there with them. It has served it's purpose, and for me- that has been something far more than 'just' a place to write my ramblings and feelings. It has been a place that has sparked friendships that I know will endure the sands of time, and that is precious to me.

I believe that nothing in life is 'happenstance' that with each and every thing that happens that there IS a reason behind it.

We all have the choice in life to spend our time looking back and mourning over what was, or we can celebrate the gifts of what those moments brought us, the friendships we made, and move forward.

I learned many years ago, that time spent looking back at things that can't be changed, is time and opportunities missed on what is happening in front of your eyes at that very moment.

It is timely that as the year came to an end, that this chapter in my life also came to an end, but I know that as that chapter closed, a new one is waiting to begin- to be discovered, and the possibilities are endless.

Is it just me, or aren't the ideas of that exciting?

Happy New Year- I wrote in my old journal several weeks ago that big changes would be happening in that space come the first of the year- little did I know how big those changes would be-- only not in that space, but another. Funny how things happen sometime isn't it?

I have a feeling this is only the beginning of what promises to be a year filled with fun, excitement, changes, and love-

More later as I collect my thoughts on the reflection of the past year, and the anticipation of what I'd like to see in this one.

For now- you can fine me here, or at wordpress- or for those of you who know my name, you can find me on facebook.